Losing my dad and what I learned before the global pandemic

I've been restless. Really, really restless. I also looked back at my blog posts and realized it's been years since posting. The last time I really posted my oldest child was starting kindergarten and now he is going into the 7th grade. Sometime soon I'll write about what I am restless about. If you are finding this now, it is the year 2020. We are in the middle of a global pandemic. Life as we knew it is completely different. A year ago, I don't think anyone would have seen this coming. Certainly not me. Yet it's odd because I find myself thinking....what are the important things in life? What really matters? And all of the things that keep coming back to me are my family, people, living life, enjoying the simple things, and not taking one day of your life for granted. I also feel like I learned these lessons through my dad's illness. I really learned them over the past two years and the pandemic is only showing how true those life lessons were. The blog posted I posted yesterday was one I had written when my dad was still alive in February 2019. Sadly, he passed away in January. I can definitely say this year has been one of the hardest of my life. Losing a person you love dearly definitely takes a toll on you. Living and not knowing when this person will pass away takes a toll on you. Every time the phone rings, every time you would visit and the person you love is quickly disappearing before your eyes. I am not going to dwell on his illness or what things he lost from his disease. I am going to choose what I learned from the experience and what I learned from my dad. My dad and I have always had a super close relationship. I was always the daddy's little girl. He would often call me on the phone and say, "I just wanted to say hello and see how you were doing." Do you have any idea how much I would love to hear the phone ring and to hear his voice on the line? I regret so much that I didn't spend more time talking to him. About everything. About nothing. The fact that someone wants to call you just to check on you and they have no other motive except that they love and care about you is nothing to take lightly. If you have a parent alive today, please call them. Call them all of the time. And if your relationship isn't the best, think and really think about what it is and why it is that your relationship is broken and if you never spoke to this person again, would you be okay with it? We got to have these conversations. He would tell me over and over again how proud he was of me. He would always tell me how lucky I am to have a good husband and two good boys. We would tell each other all of the time, "I love you" when I would go visit him at the nursing home. I am so glad he never completely lost his voice. I am so glad he was able to communicate with us up until the end. I'm glad I was able to be there with him at the end. Right now with the global pandemic, so many are not able to be with their loved ones at the hospital or in the nursing home. I miss him, but I am glad he didn't have to live through this time. I'm glad I didn't have to live with the idea of him being alone in a room and us not being able to visit him.