I'm Taking a Break
I will have to add a photo to this post later, but the title says it all! Actually, the title of this post is what is on the mug that I got from my best friend from Christmas. I have to laugh at this because it seems that motherhood (at least for me) is completely the opposite of taking a break. I see that my last post was from July, only 6 months ago!
Life with two little ones is crazy busy. Most days I am completely tired, stressed out, wondering what was I thinking waiting so late to have children within 3 years of each other? Yet life is good for me. I really can't complain too much. I do feel burnt out some days on motherhood, on the constant care and attention of caring for little ones on too little sleep. Yet I realize just how precious these days and times are. How quickly they are slipping by.
I have spent a lot of my time since April nursing my little one. I can't believe that we have made it past the 9 month mark nursing (and proud to say 6 months of it he was exclusively breastfed except for a few ounces of formula here and there to get rid of his jaundice). I have had clogged ducts, milk blebs (a milk blister of sorts), issues with being afraid of his teeth, etc. but I know that this is my last baby and I'm hanging on to his baby-ness for as long as I can. I have a freezer full of breast milk waiting to give him via the bottle if I should choose to wean him, which has crossed my mind a few thousand times as he has fallen asleep and he's hanging off my breast for over an hour as I try to figure out how to unlatch him. He has been sick with a few ear infections this winter and even a case of bronchialitis from a cold that Nathan caught from pre-school, which is another reason why I have kept on with the nursing. There were a few times when he would nurse, come off my breast, then back on, then back off...and when I thought that he may be weaning himself, what I felt most of all was that I didn't want him to stop, that I wasn't quite ready to stop with him yet. There's nothing like reality to well, realize what it is that you truly want.
Sorry if that is too much detail with the nursing, but nursing is something which takes up a lot of my time these days and has prevented me from well being social with other people. I know that he takes a bottle just fine, but I really hate to be away from him for too long.
My other son has had some difficulties adjusting to having a baby brother and sharing attention. He has started pre-school and I am amazed at how he is doing. I knew that the beginning would be difficult (which for about two weeks was), but he loves to play pre-school and will song the songs at home. He is completely potty-trained now as of last weekend and will now tell you when he needs to poop and will go! I really never thought that he would ever leave my side for a moment or would ever tell me he needs to go poop or pee and now here he is completely potty trained.
I must admit 3 years of age has been challenging to me. I have some days not very much patience for the power struggles and temper tantrums, but at the same time this age is so endearing. What I try to remind myself is that 3 is still very, very young and we're still in an adjustment period with the baby. I also have heard stories of how I was jealous when children would come into my parents' restaurant, I would go guard the high chairs. And I was the baby, the youngest in my family and was jealous of other children wanting to use the high chairs that used to belong to me. I know that jealousy is a very common emotion and I try to remember that I, too, was a difficult child at times.
Life really is just status quo for now. We really are truly blessed. My hubby has a job, we have two sets of loving grandparents that live nearby, and we have each other. On snowy cold wintry days, I am so happy to not have to go to work and can stay home and snuggle my two boys. I know that these days and times are stressful, but I know that someday I will miss these times very much so I try to just relish the simplicity of having two little ones and the sweet innocence and excitement that little things like a smile, a laugh, a poop on the potty can bring.
Life with two little ones is crazy busy. Most days I am completely tired, stressed out, wondering what was I thinking waiting so late to have children within 3 years of each other? Yet life is good for me. I really can't complain too much. I do feel burnt out some days on motherhood, on the constant care and attention of caring for little ones on too little sleep. Yet I realize just how precious these days and times are. How quickly they are slipping by.
I have spent a lot of my time since April nursing my little one. I can't believe that we have made it past the 9 month mark nursing (and proud to say 6 months of it he was exclusively breastfed except for a few ounces of formula here and there to get rid of his jaundice). I have had clogged ducts, milk blebs (a milk blister of sorts), issues with being afraid of his teeth, etc. but I know that this is my last baby and I'm hanging on to his baby-ness for as long as I can. I have a freezer full of breast milk waiting to give him via the bottle if I should choose to wean him, which has crossed my mind a few thousand times as he has fallen asleep and he's hanging off my breast for over an hour as I try to figure out how to unlatch him. He has been sick with a few ear infections this winter and even a case of bronchialitis from a cold that Nathan caught from pre-school, which is another reason why I have kept on with the nursing. There were a few times when he would nurse, come off my breast, then back on, then back off...and when I thought that he may be weaning himself, what I felt most of all was that I didn't want him to stop, that I wasn't quite ready to stop with him yet. There's nothing like reality to well, realize what it is that you truly want.
Sorry if that is too much detail with the nursing, but nursing is something which takes up a lot of my time these days and has prevented me from well being social with other people. I know that he takes a bottle just fine, but I really hate to be away from him for too long.
My other son has had some difficulties adjusting to having a baby brother and sharing attention. He has started pre-school and I am amazed at how he is doing. I knew that the beginning would be difficult (which for about two weeks was), but he loves to play pre-school and will song the songs at home. He is completely potty-trained now as of last weekend and will now tell you when he needs to poop and will go! I really never thought that he would ever leave my side for a moment or would ever tell me he needs to go poop or pee and now here he is completely potty trained.
I must admit 3 years of age has been challenging to me. I have some days not very much patience for the power struggles and temper tantrums, but at the same time this age is so endearing. What I try to remind myself is that 3 is still very, very young and we're still in an adjustment period with the baby. I also have heard stories of how I was jealous when children would come into my parents' restaurant, I would go guard the high chairs. And I was the baby, the youngest in my family and was jealous of other children wanting to use the high chairs that used to belong to me. I know that jealousy is a very common emotion and I try to remember that I, too, was a difficult child at times.
Life really is just status quo for now. We really are truly blessed. My hubby has a job, we have two sets of loving grandparents that live nearby, and we have each other. On snowy cold wintry days, I am so happy to not have to go to work and can stay home and snuggle my two boys. I know that these days and times are stressful, but I know that someday I will miss these times very much so I try to just relish the simplicity of having two little ones and the sweet innocence and excitement that little things like a smile, a laugh, a poop on the potty can bring.
posted by Princess at 8:52 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home