Facing the Fearful Unknown
So I missed posting in the month of February. I'm not sure if anyone is still reading...if so leave a comment. :)
Life is going at a crazy speed ahead. I found out last week that my due date is actually four days later...the ob/gyn office said that you go with the later date if it's within 7 days so my due date is in actuality 6 weeks from tomorrow.
And I'm worried. I'm scared. Yet I think about all of the things I've been scared about in the past 3 years and I know that I will be okay. I was petrified when my little guy was a baby and being alone with him after my parents left and my husband was off to work and school. I was so petrified of actual childbirth and how painful labor would be. I was afraid of my little guy getting immunizations and whether or not he would have autism. I was afraid of when I couldn't breastfeed at the breast and had to pump breastmilk around the clock of what would happen once he became mobile. I couldn't imagine life with him moving around and being in a different place than when I last put him down. And now I am afraid of what will happen to him...how he'll be affected when a new brother is going to demand most of my time and attention and the attention will not be all of his any more.
Yet I know that I have gotten through so many things as a mother. I know that "this too shall pass." I know that there will be hard days, hard moments, sleep deprivation, emotional ups and downs...tears shed probably be all of us, but I know that as each second, each minute, each hour, and as each day passes, time will continue marching on. My little guy is growing up and I know that he will love having a sibling, as I know that I will love having a baby again. (I may need to refer to this post sometime six weeks from now or so).
Today I ran a quick errand and as I buckled him into his car seat, he said, "Am I going to have a sister?" I said, "No, you are going to have a brother." And he said, "After I have a brother, is a sister going to go into your belly?" And I said, "No, I think your daddy and I are done after your brother is born." I proceeded to tell him what a great big brother he is going to be and how he can help mommy with the new baby and how he'll have someone new to play with. And he told me how he is going to have a brother and then a sister. I do not think that is happening!
Just the other day, he was not so enthused and said that he didn't want the baby to come out.
I will take each day as it comes, as I've done before.
So
Life is going at a crazy speed ahead. I found out last week that my due date is actually four days later...the ob/gyn office said that you go with the later date if it's within 7 days so my due date is in actuality 6 weeks from tomorrow.
And I'm worried. I'm scared. Yet I think about all of the things I've been scared about in the past 3 years and I know that I will be okay. I was petrified when my little guy was a baby and being alone with him after my parents left and my husband was off to work and school. I was so petrified of actual childbirth and how painful labor would be. I was afraid of my little guy getting immunizations and whether or not he would have autism. I was afraid of when I couldn't breastfeed at the breast and had to pump breastmilk around the clock of what would happen once he became mobile. I couldn't imagine life with him moving around and being in a different place than when I last put him down. And now I am afraid of what will happen to him...how he'll be affected when a new brother is going to demand most of my time and attention and the attention will not be all of his any more.
Yet I know that I have gotten through so many things as a mother. I know that "this too shall pass." I know that there will be hard days, hard moments, sleep deprivation, emotional ups and downs...tears shed probably be all of us, but I know that as each second, each minute, each hour, and as each day passes, time will continue marching on. My little guy is growing up and I know that he will love having a sibling, as I know that I will love having a baby again. (I may need to refer to this post sometime six weeks from now or so).
Today I ran a quick errand and as I buckled him into his car seat, he said, "Am I going to have a sister?" I said, "No, you are going to have a brother." And he said, "After I have a brother, is a sister going to go into your belly?" And I said, "No, I think your daddy and I are done after your brother is born." I proceeded to tell him what a great big brother he is going to be and how he can help mommy with the new baby and how he'll have someone new to play with. And he told me how he is going to have a brother and then a sister. I do not think that is happening!
Just the other day, he was not so enthused and said that he didn't want the baby to come out.
I will take each day as it comes, as I've done before.
So
posted by Princess at 3:23 PM
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